Someone once said, "There are years that ask questions, and there are years that answer." This is an answer year for me. For sure. I am learning of what I am made, learning of what I am capable of doing, and continually being surprised along the way. I am both so much weaker and stronger than I ever knew. Where I thought my naivete had waned, I realize I am as immature as ever.

I now am more creative, though. I don't know if that comes after 38 years of being fed up with other people's crap, or if it just means that I finally have some confidence in my own art. (Probably both.)

News worthy: have an appointment for breast reduction consultation in one week.

I even uploaded movies onto my ipod

All righty all righty all right. I'm here. Apparently all that I'm getting done today is some computer time--Ivy's the only one who's even dressed and it's going on 11:00. On the up side, I have reconnected with my friend Nathan (from high school and beyond, but lost touch in about '95) and am so happy!!!! He doesn't facebook though, so it's a lot of emailing. Super awesome to find him and talk--he and I were super super close and I have really missed him a ton.
Portland in the a.m. I am so freaking excited, you just don't even know. I haven't traveled by myself in ages--not since working for Zutopia, so that is way before Cedar was even a consideration. I am almost packed, and my suitcase is kinda funny-it's got a rain jacket, hiking boots, summery skirt, tank tops, and all kinds of other strange combinations because the weather there is like here lately--cold & rainy one day, warm & sunny the next. I think we (Alison & I) are going to drive to the coast one day, and we have a bunch of wine tasting planned. Other than that, we're playing it by ear and are just going to run around the city and have fun. Oh, and sleep in and get drunk and all that good stuff. I CANNOT WAIT. I seriously need a break from my kids and my husband. I could not love them any more than I do but dear lord everyone needs a break sometimes. Blake will get to go to Jacobson the weekend after I'm back, so he'll get a break too (and I'm going to send him off camping w the boys for a weekend, too). I am just excited to be a girl/woman for a few days and not be seen as someone's wife or mother. My identity is kind of... lacking these days, and I need to kind of remember who I am--not in relation to anyone else.
Guys, we only get ONE life to live. Just ONE. Yeah, I'm going to miss them, but I can't wait to miss them.

Ivy is everywhere. She is upstairs like every 5 minutes (has figured out the gate, too). Cedar has voluntarily used the toilet all day so far (she missed a little last time, but really tried). I hope and pray this means she is ready to give up the pull-ups. We seriously need the money.

I just got an offer to interview for a job at the Mohegan Sun casino (retail mgmt) in Conneticut. I'm not going to, but kind of neat.


Current unemployment extension until July 3rd, and pretty sure I'll get one more after that for another 13 weeks. That's probably it, then. I need to work on my resume, I guess. Ick.

OK, so much to do and less than 24 hours to do it all.

Can't make this shit up

I'm impatiently waiting for the results of my gluten sensitivity/celiac disease test. I should know within the next three days--it's just that it's already been over 3 weeks. I have been doing my anti-candida elimination diet since the 2nd week in January. I'm down around 15 pounds and hope to keep going for another 10 at least. My wedding rings fit back on last night. That was a big moment. I just want to know what's going on, so that I can meet w/my chiropractor, Dr. Josh, and come up with a gameplan and a list of what I can eat and what I can't.

Seriously, I just want my coffee w/ cream and sugar and some red wine back. I can handle almost anything else. I do miss me some Punch Pizza, too.

Its been 4 months or so since I've written. Don't know what to say about that. Health care bill passed the House last night. Now for the Senate & then Pres. Obama to sign. HOORAY.

Blake took Cedar to Dunn Brothers' on Saturday morning, to give me a little break. He wore his NRA hat into the coffeeshop--the one right by Macalester. Funny.

Still on unemployment. Yep.

Ivy's in the throes of a major cold/yuck/illness. She had a chest x-ray taken last week, and she either has some bronchitis or asthma going on. We're doing the nebulizer treatment twice a day, which is going OK. The first few times she threw a fit, but now she knows it's time that she gets to be snuggled and held. Such good kid. Even if she did keep me up most of last night and now I'm seriously dragging.

Cedar is in a major naughty streak. Twice this weekend she had to be flung over Blake's shoulder, crying and screaming as she was made to leave a store. A few weeks ago, she painted herself, the coffee table, and half the living room with a container off greek yogurt. Her favorite foods right now are fortune cookies and gum. And she prefers "cold water with ice" to drink.

Ivy is saying "What's this/that?" and walking/climbing everywhere. Fearless, this kid is. She loves standing on the arms of the leather chairs so that she can see out the windows. She also says "Hi" about 50 times a day. She's got a confirmed case of eczema, with a bad patch on her cheek. We're working on keeping it under control.

Blake is working a million hours of overtime. It's been nice for the checking account, but we miss him. He and I tried to have some quality time together last night, but Miss Ivy wasn't having any of it. Stinker.

Alison flies in on Thursday, so we can go see the Wilson brothers at the Pantages on Friday night. I am so excited to hang with her and see this show, oh man, I can't even say. I think she's going to spend the night here on Friday--which means I really need to get cleaning.

I just cut off a ton of hair and went back to blonde. So happy! Love Brentt at Moxie St. Paul!